We loved the writings on peace we received from students. You will love them too! These young people explored from so many perspectives.
Enjoy this delightful essay by Arreli Mendiola about her strong peacemaking mother. Arreli is a student at Salt Lake Community College working on prerequisites to apply to pharmacy school.
Maria de Jesus Perez
Google defines Peacemaker as a person who brings about peace, especially by reconciling adversaries. Google also gives examples of peacemakers being diplomats, referees, judges, and mediators. While Google provides extraordinary examples of peacemakers, the examples given are not those who I know to be peacemakers in my life. Growing up in an under-resourced community implies not having your typical educated ‘peacemaker,’ the only peacemaker I knew then and now is my mother.
My mother, Maria De Jesus Perez, is an intricate woman, who although has yet to reach her fifties has lived and experienced more than most of her peers. She is 1 of 12 children, 1 of 9 sisters, and raised 3 children on her own. She was born in an impoverished pueblo in rural Michoacan, Mexico, where she was only allowed to receive an education up until the 8th grade. Like any other young woman in Mexico, she married young at the age of 16. At 18, she welcomed her first son into the world, thinking her life had taken a turn for the better. What she did not know yet was her life would soon turn to disarray.
She was forced to leave the only life she had ever known in Mexico. She said goodbye to her parents, not knowing it would be the last time she would ever see them. In 1997 she found a new home in Utah. Married life had not been kind to my mother. It was this same married life that led her to become a victim of domestic and economic abuse.
After years of ongoing abuse, she made the difficult decision to leave the unfortunate marriage. In 2007, my mother found herself newly divorced, a single mother of 3 children, and in a foreign country she did not know the language of. Working 2 to 3 jobs to make ends meet for her children was hard, but she overcame it all and became a better version of herself.
If you were to ask her ‘do you regret marrying your ex-husband?' she would say no. She does not regret the lesson he taught her, and how these circumstances have molded her to be the person she is today. These unpleasant memories drove her to become a peacemaker in other people's lives.
Maria De Jesus Perez raised us to never choose violence. Years of suffering from physical and verbal abuse had taught her that no good ever comes from being violent.
My mother, Maria De Jesus Perez, is an intricate woman, who although has yet to reach her fifties has lived and experienced more than most of her peers. She is 1 of 12 children, 1 of 9 sisters, and raised 3 children on her own. She was born in an impoverished pueblo in rural Michoacan, Mexico, where she was only allowed to receive an education up until the 8th grade. Like any other young woman in Mexico, she married young at the age of 16. At 18, she welcomed her first son into the world, thinking her life had taken a turn for the better. What she did not know yet was her life would soon turn to disarray.
She was forced to leave the only life she had ever known in Mexico. She said goodbye to her parents, not knowing it would be the last time she would ever see them. In 1997 she found a new home in Utah. Married life had not been kind to my mother. It was this same married life that led her to become a victim of domestic and economic abuse.
After years of ongoing abuse, she made the difficult decision to leave the unfortunate marriage. In 2007, my mother found herself newly divorced, a single mother of 3 children, and in a foreign country she did not know the language of. Working 2 to 3 jobs to make ends meet for her children was hard, but she overcame it all and became a better version of herself.
If you were to ask her ‘do you regret marrying your ex-husband?' she would say no. She does not regret the lesson he taught her, and how these circumstances have molded her to be the person she is today. These unpleasant memories drove her to become a peacemaker in other people's lives.
Maria De Jesus Perez raised us to never choose violence. Years of suffering from physical and verbal abuse had taught her that no good ever comes from being violent.
Having a sibling close in age means there are a lot of unavoidable fights. There was this one time at the age of 5, when my little brother stole my favorite pink chair and broke it. I remember being so angry, I pushed him. Unfortunately, this left my little brother with scrapes on his elbows. Upon hearing my brothers' cries, my mother came out of nowhere and asked what had happened. My annoying little bother of course hyperventilating, told her exactly what had happened.
I remember the look of disappointment on my mother's face as she turned to me and said, ‘Arreli Guadelupe Mendiola nunca uses violence contra la gente que te quiere mija.’ This translates to 'Arreli Guadelupe Mendiola, do not ever use violence against the people who love you.' It was in this moment our favorite punishment was born. Every time my siblings and I would fight, we were forced to cook something together. Starting with the recipe, we were always a bit mad, however by the time the food was ready, it was as if we had never fought in the first place. Not only did Maria De Jesus Perez teach us not to use violence, but also the significance of teamwork and communication when resolving conflicts. However, her teachings would not end there.
I remember the look of disappointment on my mother's face as she turned to me and said, ‘Arreli Guadelupe Mendiola nunca uses violence contra la gente que te quiere mija.’ This translates to 'Arreli Guadelupe Mendiola, do not ever use violence against the people who love you.' It was in this moment our favorite punishment was born. Every time my siblings and I would fight, we were forced to cook something together. Starting with the recipe, we were always a bit mad, however by the time the food was ready, it was as if we had never fought in the first place. Not only did Maria De Jesus Perez teach us not to use violence, but also the significance of teamwork and communication when resolving conflicts. However, her teachings would not end there.
The fall of 2005 was when I first met Eliza. She and I both attended HeadStart in Hyrum, Utah. I remember our first fight, when we both wanted to play with Dora. This singular Dora was the start of a year's lengthy battle. Everything was a competition for us, who painted better, who had the best Dora backpack, and who had the new Heelys shoes.
This went on for years, until we reached the 4th grade, when a petty fight where “I hate You” was exchanged and as a result I came home crying. My kind mother sat there and listened to me vent. When I was done, my mother asked me why I had not tried to work it out. I said ‘ABSOLUTELY NOT! That girl is my enemy!’ To which my mother replied, ‘How do you know that if you’ve never tried to befriend her?’
At first, I was completely against the idea; however, my mother talked me into it by saying I should always try it and if it does not work out, then at least I tried to be the bigger person. The next morning on the bus, I apologized to Eliza and told her I did not hate her and was just jealous of her bright pink hair. To which she also apologized, and stated she did not hate me either, she was just jealous of my pink MP3 player. The wisdom my mother had bestowed upon me had led me to a lifelong friendship. Where I realized, peace would always be worth it, and choosing violence would cause more harm.
These wise teachings of never choosing violence, choosing to make peace over fighting, and overall, just trying to be the bigger person has shaped who I am today. I would be lying if I said her peacemaker characteristics did not blossom in me. Amongst my friends I am known to avoid conflict. Choosing to resolve the conflicts we encounter instead. They know that if they have an issue with me, we can work it out together. My approach to solving conflicts with teamwork and communication derives from my mother's teachings. Maria De Jesus Perez is by no means Martin Luther King Jr. or Nelson Mandela; however, they share one thing in common--choosing peace over violence.
To me, Maria De Jesus Perez is my hero, my teacher, my peacemaker, and I am extremely lucky to call her my mother.
This went on for years, until we reached the 4th grade, when a petty fight where “I hate You” was exchanged and as a result I came home crying. My kind mother sat there and listened to me vent. When I was done, my mother asked me why I had not tried to work it out. I said ‘ABSOLUTELY NOT! That girl is my enemy!’ To which my mother replied, ‘How do you know that if you’ve never tried to befriend her?’
At first, I was completely against the idea; however, my mother talked me into it by saying I should always try it and if it does not work out, then at least I tried to be the bigger person. The next morning on the bus, I apologized to Eliza and told her I did not hate her and was just jealous of her bright pink hair. To which she also apologized, and stated she did not hate me either, she was just jealous of my pink MP3 player. The wisdom my mother had bestowed upon me had led me to a lifelong friendship. Where I realized, peace would always be worth it, and choosing violence would cause more harm.
These wise teachings of never choosing violence, choosing to make peace over fighting, and overall, just trying to be the bigger person has shaped who I am today. I would be lying if I said her peacemaker characteristics did not blossom in me. Amongst my friends I am known to avoid conflict. Choosing to resolve the conflicts we encounter instead. They know that if they have an issue with me, we can work it out together. My approach to solving conflicts with teamwork and communication derives from my mother's teachings. Maria De Jesus Perez is by no means Martin Luther King Jr. or Nelson Mandela; however, they share one thing in common--choosing peace over violence.
To me, Maria De Jesus Perez is my hero, my teacher, my peacemaker, and I am extremely lucky to call her my mother.
